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Saturday, April 10, 2010

What a Beautiful Day

He never knew it but walking threw fifth avenue on that rainy day was a small choice that determined his future. He stopped at the local coffee shop for a blended mocha before heading for the park, and sat down on the usual bench he rested on, in between classes. Leah had brown hair and worked at a local bakery downtown, her flower printed apron, glowing smile, and confident personality, was just the thing to catch Eli's attention. Eli was very focused in his studies, and was planning to major in Medical Science, so perhaps that day in the park, wasn't supposed to turn out being the day he was emotionally drawn to Leah, but for many reasons he was. When Eli wanted something he did anything to get it, he was stubborn and knew exactly what he wanted when he saw it, so it wasn't long before they grabbed there first bite to eat, and later that week realizing there was attractive, went and saw a movie. It only took sixty seven days for her to say "I love you." What a feeling that was for each of them, a blessing in and of its self, and that’s how after one hundred and sixteen days he asked her what she was doing for the rest of her life? Lucy knew Eli was the one she wanted to spend her forever with, but started to doubt it after the one hundredth and eighty ninth day where he almost lost that girl to his foolish pride. There was nothing perfect about Eli and Leah, noting at all, but when they were together the world seemed to be a better place, and when they weren’t nothing seemed right. He was the one to pull everything together no matter the problem, where as Leah contemplated whether or not they could make it. Love should never be a fight, but was something worth fighting for, and Leah ended up saying I do on day four eighty two, and soon after gave him a son on day seven sixty one. There were many chances Lucy had to leave and always chose to stay, for she knew the feeling of love, and knew she wasn’t mean for anyone else, what a beautiful moment every minute Eli spent with her, what a beautiful day. After eighteen thousand two hundred and fifty three days that was fifty years and an unremarkable journey of existence, who would have known that two young beings could spend fifty years enjoying a life full of laughter, and trust, and sacrifice. What a feeling, what a wonderful emotion, what a life, counting their blessings, threw ups and downs, and every time he’s on his knees, he thanks god he said hello on 5th avenue.

3 comments:

  1. i liked this story but i thought that some parts of if could be reworeded or changed a little bit. Like when it is first talking about eli's emosional feelings towards leah. But good story

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  2. i liked it, it was different. some of the time i had a hard time reading it, maybe some paragraph breaks would be good, and maybe some parts could be reworded. good job though i like the day# idea.

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  3. I really like this song, so I'm glad you adapted it into a story. I really like the little details you added, especially at the beginning. I like how you follow the plot of the song, but I wish you didn't use all the day #s and phrases right out of the song because it makes it sound too much like the song. Also, I would work on the grammar because it distracts from the story you are trying to tell.

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